Our No More Secrets Walk is intended to encourage our community to prevent child abuse and to encourage families to protect and nurture children. We hope you will join us because we are going to have a great time.

Come enjoy the weather with us on April 17, as we walk to prevent child abuse. Then stay for food, fun, and entertainment. You could also win some fabulous prizes in our drawings. Check in is at 10:30. The walk/run begins at 11:00. Free hot dogs and drinks at 12:30. Entertainment and drawings last until 3:00.

Tell all your friends.

Preregistration is encouraged, but you can also register at the park, on the day of the walk. Register online at www.ahealingplacemonument.com, or register by mail at No More Secrets, 1304 N. Redwood Rd. #128, Saratoga Springs, Utah 84045. Registration is $5.00 a person. Register before April 1 and get a free t-shirt.

We will introduce our plans for A Healing Place, a monument to healing in remembrance of Abused Children. To find out more about A Healing Place, come walk with us on April 17.

We can use volunteers and sponsors. No More Secrets. Spread the word.

Linda Garner

It was such a pleasure to share Some Secrets Hurt with a group of students at Wood River High School in Hailey, Idaho, in December. Recently I received some delightful letters from the students, thanking me for my presentation. Over the next few days, I will share some of their letters with you. When I think about these students and read their letters, I often ask myself, What do they know that we don’t know.

I would love to give a presentation in your school. My presentation is informative, non-threatening, and age appropriate. I have a presentation for elementary students, middle school students, and high school students. If you would like more information on my presentation, email lindagarner@somesecretshurt.com. I can send you the details and you can send them to your principal. There is no charge for my presentation. Let’s empower children and teenagers to take control of their own bodies.

Together, we can make a difference.

Linda Garner

Won’t you join us in the fight against Child Abuse by walking with us on April 17? We would love to have your support and participation. We will also be raising money for A Healing Place, the beautiful monument we hope to raise in the heart of Salt Lake City. A place where we can come to find peace and healing. A place where we can remember those who have been abused. A place where we can stand up for kids. To find out more, Check my September 9 blog.

We are looking for the perfect place to hold our walkathon. We are looking for a place that is family friendly. We are looking for a place where our track can be a loop, so that serious walkers can keep going and challenged walkers can stop when they feel finished. We also want to have a kids track. Suggestion so far are Gardner Village, Sugar House Park, and Liberty Park. Do you have other ideas?

Will you walk with us on April 17?

Linda Garner

If the unthinkable happened to someone you love, would you know what to do? Would they? If one of your children were being abused would they tell you? Would you notice that something was wrong?

The startling truth is that in the United States today, one in four girls will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. One in six boys will be sexually abused before the age of eighteen. One third of them will never tell anyone. Contrary to popular belief, 90% of abused children know their abuser. Could one of those children belong to you?
How do you spot abuse? Of course, we all believe it will never happen to one of our kids, but given the statistics, we should all know what to watch for.

Notice anything that doesn’t feel right. Pay attention to behavior changes, especially sudden switches. Be on the look out for changes in relationships and signs of withdrawal from friends or family member. Watch for signs that indicate something is troubling your child. A change in eating habits can be a signal, as can nightmares and bedwetting. Unexplained sadness, anger, or fears should be carefully explored.

With teenagers, there can be additional signs. Any of the signs already mentioned can be present, but there can be others as well. Teenagers who have been sexually abused may avoid dating. They may voice an extreme dislike of the opposite sex and a desire never to marry. Or they may visit the opposite extreme and become obsessed with the opposite sex and have a desire to marry early. Some teenagers may turn to promiscuity, alcohol, or drugs as a result of sexual abuse. Suicidal tendencies and self-injurious thoughts can also come from sexual abuse.

Knowing what to watch for gives you knowledge. Being involved in your child’s life gives you influence. Open the lines of communication with each of your children. Show interest and have lots of dialog with them. Be a good listener. Be a safe person for your child to talk to. Be aware of what’s happening in her life. Know where he is going, and with whom. Get to know your child’s friends.

Talk to your child about abuse. Children sometimes become victims because they don’t have enough information. Realize that boys as well as girls can be targets for abuse. Remember that age is not a factor. Teenagers are sometimes abused. Small children are sometimes abused. Make sure that your child knows that abuse is not acceptable and that they can come to you with anything. Children do not have the ability to fight abuse on their own. Make sure they know that you are will back them up. Abuse is never the child’s fault. Make sure they know that.

Education is the key. We can’t be everywhere, but we can empower children to take control of their own bodies. We can give them tools. We can give them a voice.

Linda Garner

P.S.

Feel free to download the Parents Guide from this website. You can print it out for easy reference. You can share it with a friend. You can keep a copy in your purse, or wallet. The Parents Guide is from the book Some Secrets Hurt, which is available at most bookstores, and also online in the usual places.

This is my second visit with high school students. Both visits were very positive. I find it interesting that my first presentations have been to high school students. Even more interesting is the warm response I am getting from them. What do they know, that we don’t know?

I have always said that this isn’t an ordinary children’s book. This is the children’s book that is for everyone. Don’t be fooled by the simplicity of the book. Some Secrets Hurt has a powerful message. Who needs this message? Everyone needs this message. Parents, teachers, children, teenagers, church leaders….everyone. You need this message.

In January, I hope to start visiting elementary schools. Maybe I should rethink that. Maybe high schools are the place to go. I would love to visit your school. I would love to visit your church group, your women’s group, your youth group. I can give a presentation on writing. I can give a presentation on abuse. I can give a presentation on self esteem. Or all three. Your choice.

It true. Some secrets hurt.

Linda Garner

I know there hasn’t been much holiday advertising for Some Secrets Hurt. You don’t see it in newspaper ads or TV commercials. It’s not on the top of most kids lists. It doesn’t transform into another shape. It doesn’t cry, wet, or talk. I guess it’s not the usual kind of gift.

Maybe you haven’t even thought about giving Some Secrets Hurt as a gift. Some people have. I know a grandmother who is giving it to all her grandkids. I know an aunt who is giving it to nieces and nephews. I know a big brother who is giving it to a younger sister. I know families that are giving it as teacher gifts.

Why would you want to give Some Secrets Hurt? To open honest dialog between children and parents about a subject that is often ignored? To educate a child about how to avoid abuse? To educate parents about keeping kids safe? To give parents a tool, and to give kids a voice? To empower kids and teenagers to take control of their own bodies?

Those are compelling reasons to give this gift. What are your reasons?

Who’s on your list?

Linda Garner

What a good idea. This is a gift that any teacher can use in the classroom to make a difference in children’s lives, not just now, but for years to come. Can you imagine the impact of many teachers sharing this book with many students, in many communities?

As teachers read Some Secrets Hurt to kids in their class, children can learn how to take control of their own bodies. They can learn how to recognize abuse and what to do about it. They can learn how to say no. Children don’t always learn this at home. Teachers can help. Keeping kids safe is everyone’s job.

This is a great day for Christmas shopping. Why not buy a special gift for the teachers in your world? Who knows how many lives you can touch, by giving this gift.

Tis the Season

Linda Garner

Please join the Teddy Bear Ladies on Tuesday Nov 24 at the Rock Creek Church at , Provo. The Ladies make Teddy Bears for abused children. They make 50 bears each month which will be given to the Childrens Justice Center in Provo for the children who are serviced there. At the November meeting, the ladies need to make 100 bears so that they can take December off. These amazing women have been making bears for the children for 18 years. Let’s give them a hand.

They meet the 4th Tuesday of each month from 3:00 until 8:00 at the Rock Creek LDS Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room. You can come and go at your convenience during those hours.

If you can’t come, but would like to donate fabric or cash, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482. If you can’t come but would like to sew some bears, give Ruth a call. See you there.

Linda Garner

When I spoke last week to a group of student writers, mostly high school students, I talked to them about making a difference. In my closing address, I talked about contributing something to the community we live in; the hometown community, as well as the world community. We can make a difference no matter where we live and we can start today. If you want to make a difference, then you need to live your life differently. Live your life to make a difference. Stand for something. Reach out to someone. Give. Serve.

We are all connected. We are connected to people we don’t know, people we will never meet. I love to illustrate this concept with a crocheted doily. A doily is crocheted by connecting a strand of thread with interesting stitches. We are a strand of humanity connected by interesting stitches. If I were to cut any stitch, the whole work would come unraveled, one stitch at a time. We do not see the stitches that connect us to humanity, but we are connected just the same. When one stitch is severed, all the connections break down. Each of us can do something to strengthen the connections. Each of us can make a difference.

We don’t have to travel across the world to make a difference. We can make a difference from our own computer to far away people in far away lands. We can make a difference by contributing money or time to organizations like www.risingstaroutreach.org , www.heifer.org , www.kiva.org , or www.madebysurvivors.com . These are organizations that make a difference.

Take a moment sometime soon to visit these websites. You will be impressed. You will want to help.

Rising Star Outreach provides help for leper colonies in India. Did you know that in 2009 we still have leper colonies half a world away? Rising Star provides education, food, and medical supplies for leper colonies in India. Today, leprosy is 100% curable, yet socially and economically, lepers have a difficult time moving forward.

Heifer International is an organization that provides farm animals, or seeds and equipment to impoverished families around the globe. You could buy a flock of geese, a trio of rabbits, a cow, or a water buffalo for someone who needs the food or the income these gifts can provide. A flock of ducks, chicks, or geese costs only $20.00.

Kiva International provides small business loans for entrepreneurs in countries with struggling economies. You can make a difference for as little as $25.00. Your $25.00 combines with gifts from other lenders to make big things happen. Kiva makes a loan every 24 seconds. This week so far $809,300 has been lent, 4,091 new lenders have joined,. This week, 2,2,32 entrepreneurs were funded by 1,2016 lenders.

Made by Survivors is an organization that is part of the Emancipation Network. It fights sex trafficking and removes women and their children from this environment, gives them a safe place to live, and creates an opportunity for them to make articles that can be sold in the U.S. You can provide income for these woman by buying from this website.

There are also needs in your own community. There are plenty of good causes that can use your hands. You can help in the food pantry. You can help kids in after school programs. You can read to kids, or listen while they read to you. You can visit the elderly. You can help the Teddy Bear Ladies make bears for abused kids. You can help raise money for A Healing Place. You can help us organize a walk-a-thon to prevent sexual abuse. (You can read about A Healing Place and the Teddy Bear Ladies on previous blogs.)

You can make a difference. You can write to make a difference and you can live to make a difference. You can change the world one word at time. You can change the world one minute at a time. You can start today. You can do it. You can. You.

Linda Garner

P.S.

These are some thoughts from my closing address at the Young Writers’ Conference last weekend in St. Anthony, Idaho: Wending Words, Journeying Toward Meaning. You can read thoughts from my keynote address at http://paperandparchment.blogspot.com.

The Teddy Bear Ladies make 50 bears each month and deliver them to the Childrens Justice Center to be given to the children who pass through their doors. For some children, the teddy bears become a symbol of healing. Though the Teddy Bear Ladies never meet the recipients of their gifts, they often hear the stories and they know that they are making a difference.

The Childrens Justice Centers are under the direction of the State Attorney General, Mark Shurtleff. Each Childrens Justice Center receives limited state funding for employee salaries. Each community provides the facility and maintainance plus some of the funding for counseling and training. The rest of the funds come from grants and donations.

At the Childrens Justice Center, counseling is offered for abuse victims and their families. The atmosphere is warm and comfortable, somewhat homelike. Medical Exams are available when needed. Networking with law enforcement officials and other community services is possible. In other words, a variety of help is available, and everyone gets a bear.

If you would like to help the Teddy Bear Ladies, they are would love to have you join them. They meet the 4th Tuesday of each month from 3:00 until 8:00 at the Rock Creek LDS Church at 2445 N. 650 E. in Provo. It’s right next to the Rock Creek Elementary School. Park in the back and join the bearmakers in the Relief Society Room. You can come and go at your convenience during those hours. I showed up at 7:00 last evening and stayed through cleanup, about 9:00 p.m. I stuffed 3 bears. The next Teddy Bear Night will be November 24. In November the ladies will make 100 bears, so that they can take December off. They could really use your help.

If showing up on the 4th Tuesday doesn’t work for you, there are other ways to help. The bears are all sewn before the Teddy Bear Night, ready to be stuffed and decorated. If you like to sew, they will provide the pattern and the fabric and you can sew a few bears at your own pace. This would be a big help. Getting enough bears sewn before Teddy Bear Night is a challenge. Donations of fabric and cash are always welcome. It doesn’t take a lot of fabric to make a bear. Even small pieces can be useful. Cash donations are used to buy stuffing.

If you would like to sew or donate, or if you have questions, call Ruth Brasier at 801-374-9482.

Even bears can make a difference. How about you?

Will I see you there?

Linda Garner